You're All Dead

[Neox]

Got your attention, didn't I?

But wait... the title actually does have some meaning to it:

This forum is dead. It's laying in a ditch and rotting with flies, maggots, and the occasional earthworm that got a little distracted from his dirt-munching. Nobody really posts anything interesting here, which is weird, because of all the forums I've ever been a part of since becoming a furry, this one has the most members (for a community forum), and we have a VERY active social community offline. It boggles me a bit that these boards get so little attention, and that all the intellectual posters seem to avoid this place. I can't remember the last time I participated in a discussion where the OP actually had something interesting to say, or a question was brought up that  was meant to pick peoples' brains. I'm a fan of in-depth discussion, and I KNOW THAT YOU GUYS ARE OUT THERE. I've had plenty of awesome conversations with people outside of these forums, and I know that they ARE on here.

There WAS a period where I'd check these boards every day and usually have a few new threads that I felt like throwing my 2 bits in.  I've only been here for 3 years, but I've seen a lot of new users join every month since then and it's like... more users should equal more discussion right?

Nope. It's been like exactly the opposite.

And now we've got formula topics like, "Things to complain about," and "Things to be happy about." I particularly hate those two. I get the OPs had a good idea in mind when they them: create a place for people to offload their grievances. Not a bad idea... except that I believe this is exactly what a forum is for. Now we've got a topic where people go to bitch, whine and moan, but it's completely impersonal and formulaic. It's like letter to the editor in the newspaper: you're basically writing shit and getting no feedback.

Maybe some of you aren't looking for feedback. Maybe some of you just like whining and getting your opinion out there, but it kinda defeats the purpose of having a board for discussion topics.

Maybe it's like some of the newer people here are just afraid of reprimand or backlash for their opinions. I understand that, but it's a stupid and lame excuse to keep your mouth shut. You're not going to get known and you will forever be attending the awkward dinner-meets. Open up and speak your mind about shit. Someone is bound to have ideas that align to yours (just try not to overdo it, or you might piss off the wrong people). Yes, there are some people who've been around for a long time, and they might feel the need to "set you straight," which you may take as an offence. To that, I say: suck it up, buttercup. Not everyone's going to agree with you and some of us might be outspoken and unfiltered. Pick your battles.

Don't be afraid to open up a friggin' discussion topic. Just know that if you're doing it with the intent of whining for attention, there are a few people here who will call you out on it and/or highlight the mistakes you're making. But do it anyway! I personally love picking apart peoples' rants - not because I dislike that person or anything - but because I simply like an intellectual discussion about damn near anything. I know there are a lot of other people here who would do the same and it might bring a little life back to this forum. Because honestly... I hate when I meet a new fur in the area and direct them to these forums and have to add the disclaimer: "Not really much goes on there, and most people only use the Events section..." I really really wish this place could come alive again so that furs in the area can actually get to know each other a bit and become involved in the actual community AWAY from the forums after time.

Just the thoughts of a caffeinated, opinionated dragon on his 25th birthday. Do not disregard, or I will make sure you're baked into my cake. =|

Also, this is my 500th post. Somehow relevant.

[Star Wonder]

*snuggles* The only thing I really use the forum for now is announcing meets and parties that people have a hard time getting to or are too busy for and for finding people's email to send them all invites when I can.

I feel similar on the lack of posting. I do try and check every day now. There are new things being created all the time, but there is serious lack of communication. Drives me insane sometimes... No... That's a lie. All the time.

I don't post on topics like  "Things to complain about" because when I want to complain I rant, and just say the same things over again. And generally they are things I have no control over. I try not to complain about things I can effect. But no one is perfect. I don't like reading it because I just want to comment and tell people how to go about getting what they want... or...other things... Then I get too huffy and it can come across bad and I don't deal well with confrontations - even if I am not aware there is one going on. I don't post  "Things to complain about"  because of the very reason I don't want my things picked apart. When I rant it's mostly about what JUST happened to me. But... It's not really complaining so much as getting a rant off my chest and knowing friends are listening/reading. I think I choose to rant on FA more than anywhere else because so many people talk to me there. And I can hide comments that are upsetting or have nothing to do with things or to strangers that don't understand and choose to read and respond negatively instead of just not reading and going about doing something else.

If I bitch and moan, I'd rather know someone that cares is reading, or listening, and can offer me support or just an ear.

This topic itself is a good start for good conversation and feed back. I personally feel similar with the subject matter. And feel kind of depressed how lacking in activity it is. It's become just an announcement board basically. And no one gives feed back other than a few words, when MOST announcements want details. Such as potlucks or what not ask for people to list what they want to bring or will bring or what not and all they put is "I'm so going to this!" or nothing at all and just register for it. That drives me nuts. There are so many question threads out there that people want feedback on and people don't even give a direct answer. Some are even just rants and no answers.

I hope that draggy is having a good birthday and enjoying his coffee. ^^ :-3

[tokar]

one thing i have seen in the heading bar is there is a chat option.  click on that and you get "BCFurries Creative Minecraft Server" and NO chat abilities.  check here to view what i mean .. http://www.yourworldoftext.com/~Unition/Unition

chat to me is an open forum in which i can speak my mind with anyone else that is there.  hey, how are you?  wanna meet up for coffee?  are you doing this that or the other thing?  or even to discussing the legalization of marijuana, or you just moved into a great new home.  what ever you want to 'chat' about.  but there is no chatting permitted.  sure one can send a pm to someone but then they have to wait for a reply.  if that person is online in the 'chat' room then an instant reply will be given.

chatting to me also is being able to ask a question and getting an immediate answer, and not waiting until tomorrow to read a reply.  is it not possible to actually have a chat room in here?  to access what was the previous chat it says to click 'here' but when you do there is no order to the page.  just comments posted like graffiti on a wall.

chat rooms are like walking into a room full of people and being able to have a conversation with whoever is there, so i ask why is there no 'live' chat room available?  a 'live' chat room may help to bring us out of the previously mentioned 'ditch'.

[terutt]

*Highfives on the year and post milestone*

I don't even know where to begin. Yes the forums are dead, and yes it's a damn shame especially because of the huge and vibrant offline community in the province. I think it mostly comes down to the fact that people don't like to make waves and no news is good news. No one wants to alienate anyone with a lengthy rant or the wrong opinion, especially in a forum where, really, you're not all that anonymous. If Person X goes on a winge and Person Y tells him to "suck it up, cry me a river, build me a bridge, and get over it", I'll tell you what happens:

a) Person X takes the advice at face value, follows or ignores it, and goes on with their life.
b) Person X posts some kind of countering response as to why things aren't so simple, and then Person Z jumps in and either agrees with X or Y, chastising the either of them for their actions. "You should't be too harsh! You're just an asshole." or "X is right, you're just whining." This devolves into an internet shouting match with no real end, and several people vomiting their opinions, when the original posters have long since left.

Let's recall that time we had that "civil" discussion about fursuiting at Pride. It should be in the archives somewhere. Pretty much the quietness of these forums fall under a few cases of Why We Can't Have Nice Things.

The recurring sticky threads become circle jerks of the people who post in them regularly. Having moderated discussions actually requires moderation. And throwing up a flag, any flag, is just begging to be disagreed with. I mean, could you imagine if I posted, in general talk, any topic on Pride, Fetish and the community, anything political, anything even remotely hot-button. And the other thing is, is that community wide, there's already de facto opinions and social by-laws on that shit, because we had those discussions already, and no one likes thread necromancy.

EDIT: There's a fairly active Skype-chat, and an IRC channel.

[tokar]

EDIT: There's a fairly active Skype-chat, and an IRC channel.

skype - i have managed to regularly chat with one other and he is not a furry and lives in the philippines.

irc - ????

[Drake Wingfire]

Seems a little ironic that you complain about shit being dead and then tell new people to "suck it up" when people get all cliquey and scare them away in the first place. People cannot just shit all over new people like some pseudo "grey muzzle" with something to prove/ say and then complain when people bugger off cause they just don't wanna be around people like that. Its not impressive to new people and how could it be? They come  wanting to meet interesting, FUN people and potential friends, not someone telling them whats what and trying to assert themselves and hold up a rep followed by some tough-love talk. They would go live at their day jobs if that's what they wanted.

I could beat a dead horse into a greasy pancake thin pulp saying what I said months and months ago, and I may as well again. Its the same reason I decided to leave the Skype "chat" because like most things anyone with anything interesting to say was just driven away and I got tired of the daily drivel myself and followed suit. The same talks about coffee and breakfast like we were all retired people in a nursing home, the same negative toned, tough talking "words of wisdom" and the same lonely hearts trying to flirt with everything with a pulse. There were some good and more thought out conversations there for sure hell even some hilariously fun ones when people just let go, I cannot say there weren't, problem was they were constantly drowned out by big-head measuring contests and the breakfast club who had nothing to add but attempts at grabbing the spotlight. The good conversations are still around, they are just a lot smaller and more private cause there is less headache than trying to say anything meaningful through a crowd all wanting to get 5 seconds of attention rather than adding anything. If anything these conversationalists (cause using the term Intellectuals, has too much of a "jerking off" in the wind feel in this context) were scared off because so few even have an attention span to read things in the first place, especially if it wasn't centered around them, many people I have witnessed just blurb "TL:DR", I call them "twitter thinkers" because everything they say, think or feel tends to be short, point form and rather narcissistic. So in my not so humble opinion, the "things to complain about" and "things to be happy about" forums fit right in with that mindset, better to have those areas for people who want that, than have them detailing everything else..

But now that we are all nice and high up on our pedestal, lets get rid of these useless, yet impressive looking props and get to the root of it... For there to be life around any of these places online, it can't be all serious talk and "intellectualism" have we so easily forgotten how far that's gotten other places in the past? They become snooty, cliquey, and outright a bunch of jerks. They shush the new people without trying because the new guys come in, see all these tight little circles and negative opinions when stuff does get posted (Irony here isn't lost on me as I type this). There has to be a healthy mix of serious and fun. Sure right now we have little of either, but clamoring for more deep and through provoking topics and giving the impression everything else is just boring crap isn't gonna make this place flourish or feel all that welcoming. It will just make us look like stiffs. Heck my suggestion? We need some more humorous threads or perhaps they should make a 18+ discussion area where people can actually open up and talk freely, I find that in itself tends to be very limiting when so many of our members are in their 20s-40s. At least that way there is a lot more potential.

[kohl]

You say we need more conversation but you come in just to complain?

You insult other people attempts of interactions and be little there posts.
Maybe some people arn't used to this type if interface. Maybe some people just use the MESSENGING system on the forum. Just because people arn't posting things for you to read doesn't mean they're not interacting with people.

Do you ever think to have a conversation with someone instead of posting an essay?
If you want someone to have a discussion with you, leave something open. Don't try and be so secluded in your text. Give something that people can work with. Conversation is a two way thing. People don't want to be brigade by text and accusations.

[Star Wonder]

You say we need more conversation but you come in just to complain?

You insult other people attempts of interactions and be little there posts.
Maybe some people arn't used to this type if interface. Maybe some people just use the MESSENGING system on the forum. Just because people arn't posting things for you to read doesn't mean they're not interacting with people.

Do you ever think to have a conversation with someone instead of posting an essay?
If you want someone to have a discussion with you, leave something open. Don't try and be so secluded in your text. Give something that people can work with. Conversation is a two way thing. People don't want to be brigade by text and accusations.

I don't think it's complaining. It's stating an opinion that is true. Complaining would sound more like a whining child begging for people to talk to them because they are bored or something.

Also, people don't answer messages on the Forum. I personally send people messages to try and chat, but no one replies. And when I do get a hold of them you know what they say? They hate the messaging system or just don't care or ever look at their messages.

It's actually very difficult to hold good conversation on a forum because all sorts of people decide to jump in and either belittle, berate, badger, or ruin the conversation between some people.

And this topic pretty much did what I believe was intended. Got a talking ball rolling. Now people are putting up their own opinions and actually talking.

There is a difference, again, between posting opinions and observations, and complaining. I do not see this thread as any sort of complaining but rather opinions that either agree or disagree...or some above have been downright rude and are the reason people don't like to talk on here anymore.

I enjoy smart conversations, but personally because I have mental problems, I have to be careful on forums and who I try and talk with. Ever try and start a conversation and end up getting ganged up on and not able to mentally handle it? Like...full on break down because of an illness you're born with? Then have people tell you "boo-hoo suck it up" which not only makes it worse, but can lead to a further break down. And when people are reaching for that help and instead getting that thrown at them, it can lead to serious consequences. For others it's not a mental disability, but they are just as on edge. Some people can handle some bad things, others, especially with a life time of being ganged up on, cannot. So when I try and post on a forum, I have to be careful because if I decide to voice my opinion or even try and talk with someone for the sake of conversation, I can end up in a really bad state if someone decides to be an asshat and thinks it's funny to make a mentally unstable person worse instead of holding their tongue.

I know many furs and other people that are in the same boat as I am, so generally we don't post a lot unless we are in a good state of mind. We don't like to complain on forums because of that same issue as above. I am always afraid to say something or someone will take something the wrong way. Such as posting an opinion or agreeing with someone else, and others taking it as complaining or start ripping things apart. I personally am not dissatisfied or annoyed by the lack of conversations on the forum as is the definition of complain. Just noticing things and talking about them is as it is, an opinion or observation.

[EchoRabbitJack]

I have a hard time reading huge paragraphs, but I wanted to put my short opinion down.

I just very recently joined the forums, and I would really like to have conversations with more furs and get involved but I am finding it quite difficult to get in contact. I feel like, I should possibly move to a different forums for conversation? But I do enjoy talking locally, so I will try my hardest here first. I think the problem (as a newbie) is that there are a lot of regulars and I want to fit in, but don't know how to get in the groove.

*Snuff snuff*    ._.

[Star Wonder]

I have a hard time reading huge paragraphs, but I wanted to put my short opinion down.

I just very recently joined the forums, and I would really like to have conversations with more furs and get involved but I am finding it quite difficult to get in contact. I feel like, I should possibly move to a different forums for conversation? But I do enjoy talking locally, so I will try my hardest here first. I think the problem (as a newbie) is that there are a lot of regulars and I want to fit in, but don't know how to get in the groove.

*Snuff snuff*    ._.

People find their own groups to fit in with. There are chats on here (irc) and you can always, as I said in your topic, go check the calendar and show up to an open (not private) event. Bring a friend if you're nervous. You can start with an introduction and information about yourself on a new thread somewhere it's designated on this forum. That can help.

[EchoRabbitJack]

People find their own groups to fit in with. There are chats on here (irc) and you can always, as I said in your topic, go check the calendar and show up to an open (not private) event. Bring a friend if you're nervous. You can start with an introduction and information about yourself on a new thread somewhere it's designated on this forum. That can help.

I just saw your post on my thread after I posted here. Thanks! =) heh.

[kohl]

Maybe not complaining but lashing out then. Throwing out a shock tantrum, and badly critisizing others posts.

For a newbie, just post, doesn't need to be long. I actually get more enjoyment from short posts. Makes the person seem like they know what they're talking about. As for topic, find something you like or that's in your life. Look for the Niche within the Niche. Like Gaming? mention it. Like drawing, post some, ask for requests. Like sports, reach out there. The great thing about furries is the variety, they scope just about everything. You just gotta leave some bait for someone to nibble. You won't catch much fish with no bait.

As for messaging. less then half my messages get responded to. but hey. There's 1500 people here, you'll eventually get someone that responds. When you think about it, it's not hard to start a conversation. Keep it short and sweet. You don't look someone in the face and unload paragraph after paragraph. So why do it on a forum?

[Tiger Paws]

I think the forum is very much alive. It could be more lively in areas sure. But since joining up a few months ago I've met 6  friends who i get together with weekly around each others houses or a night in the town. It is one big community on here but divided in to many smaller groups of different interests and activity's so we cant judge the forum as a whole. We just hunt out our own areas of interests as individuals. There is allot going on beyond what we see in private messages meetings and more thanks to the forum again acting as a calendar of events. Its like a fur meet in a way You go with 20 people who attend but the idea isn't to make friends with all 20 people you simply find those who share the same interests and make 1 or more new friends.

[Kuviare]

Well I don't know about the rest of people, but I am just bad at forum. Everything I join I can't keep up for longer than two weeks... To be honest the only time I come on is when I'm told/reminded to by someone else somewhere else. Heck I didn't even really know we had a general section for stuff... Much more potential than the endless forum games... which half the time aren't done right.

Anyways I think I've used enough ellipses to last me a while... _{^{wait, damnit}}

I'm a little dissappointed in some of the replies to this well-articulated and viable opinion of yours, too. I can understand how some would be offended (There's always someone, right?) but I don't think it deserves outright hostility and almost painfully thick sarcasm. As much as I'm tempted to pick apart the above offender I think it would be better of me not to. Lemme tell ya it's hella tempting though. I will say this... Just because the OP is a dragon does not make him arrogant, elitist, or narcissistic, though that is the trend stereotype. Of course that may not be the assumption that was made, but it's the one I'm going with because it's the most generous to their intelligence.

There is one part I need to address though because I can't stop alternatingly growling and facepalming about it.

Oh and of course nothing gets people to post their thoughts better then the threat that as soon as they do it will be torn apart by someone who (while not having anything against them) want to ensure that they feel as crappy as possible so that they never make the mistake of sharing their stupid stuff ever again

And who doesn't love a good self fulling prophecy, nothing gets people motivated to join a forum like telling them that it is devoid of life.

Okay... Just because you post with scathing sarcasm doesn't mean that other people can't post jokes. However, I am willing to consider that you simply didn't recognise it as humour, despite how sad it is. However, it was even misinterpreted if it was taken literally... here.

Do not disregard, or I will make sure you're baked into my cake. =|

What that means, all humour etc aside, is that he wants people to post discussion topics, get debates going, generally being more interesting, or he'll eat 'em. Not that once they post he'll eat them. Though honestly that'd make me make an even larger post and just keep going so as to delay my death. Just wanted to clear that up and see if anyone else was kinda scratching their heads there.

Regardless I think you raise a good point, Neox. There isn't anything overtly interesting that happens here. Nothing that would draw me in, certainly... it could be interesting to see if we could run a forum RP or two in here, I know for a fact there are some really excellent writers amongst the masses here. I myself have multiple ideas and actually developed worlds that I want to share, and I know I'm not alone in that.

Anyways, I am fully in agreement with a forum being a... well, a forum to voice our thoughts and opinions, not just a glorified calendar and personnel list. Because right now that's all I really see it as, beyond the pointless junk and a few useful contact information threads that haven't updated for a few months.

Looking forwards to a vicious reply filled with vitriol and snark؟!

[Drake Wingfire]

I'm a little dissappointed in some of the replies to this well-articulated and viable opinion of yours, too. I can understand how some would be offended (There's always someone, right?) but I don't think it deserves outright hostility and almost painfully thick sarcasm. As much as I'm tempted to pick apart the above offender I think it would be better of me not to. Lemme tell ya it's hella tempting though. I will say this... Just because the OP is a dragon does not make him arrogant, elitist, or narcissistic, though that is the trend stereotype. Of course that may not be the assumption that was made, but it's the one I'm going with because it's the most generous to their intelligence.

I had to really point out this lill part here, while people may not agree with Neox's outlook/ opinion on things, you can be assured that no one here is petty enough to try and drag something as trivial as species into a subject like this, at least till you tried to impose that's why people were even speaking out their different viewpoints and feelings on the subject for. Lets just keep the furry race cards in the deck because not everything revolves around that, the validity and dismiss-ability of ones words is not so easily summed up by their having a fuzzy or a scaly face. At least for those of us that know a fursona doesn't make the man.