Sup furries.
For a lot of you this is going to be your first con. And you're going to be wanting to go damn hard, right? Well fucking give this a good read and you will have a god damned good convention.
1) Holy shit. You suck at drinking. You might think you're okay at it, but you aren't. And you are going to be surrounded by seasoned party veterans. Don't try and keep up with the vets. Your tolerances aren't at our level. Drink to your own comfort level. If you feel yourself being too drunk, fucking STOP DRINKING and get some water in you. Don't let a story get around about you puking and passing out somewhere. If you are massively hung over, you will be missing a LOT of stuff the next day. Drink LOTS of water before bed. Chug that shit.
2) God damn, don't you think you're a sexy mother fucker? Well you might damn well be... but not everyone is going to be receptive to your advances. Learn the game and learn how to take NO as an answer. Don't make us uncomfortable bro, we're counting on you. If you decide you want to get down and find a partner, USE PROTECTION. Anyone that's willing to 'yiff' with you right off the bat has likely done the same thing to a tonne of people. Don't give yourself an awkward doctor's visit.
3) Fucking hell, drugs are bad okay? But if you really decide to do them don't be super fucked up in public and try to keep it on a down low. You are creating a very fucking awkward situation for the con staff and if you have a medical emergency you might bring some serious bad press to the con.
4) Bring a pair of swim shorts. There's a heated pool.... Fuck.
5) Sleep management is key to a good con experience. The parties run late and the events run all day. Are you planning to do all the con shit during the day and the dances all night? Fuck son, you better get a nap in the afternoon. Don't pull an all nighter, you will regret it.
6) There's a motherfucking grocery store right near by. There is a full sized fridge in EVERY con room. Do the fucking math. Right off the bat, go to that grocery store and put some food in your fridge. It's hard to pull yourself away from the con to go eat and if you wake up hungover you're be thankful like a motherfucker to have a sandwich in that bitch.
7) Fucker, don't leave your room a huge mess for the housekeepers to clean up. It's rude. Just because you're on vacation doesn't mean you're allowed to be a bitch. And at the end of the con? Leave a TIP on the pillow.
8) Get some extra fucking towels. Go to the front desk and do it. They give you enough towels for 2 peeps but you fucking furries are stacking 4+ deep. And you know what you do with those fucking towels? You take a motherfucking SHOWER. At LEAST once a day. I personally take like 3 or more because shower beers are fucking rad. Bring some shampoo and soap with you, the hotel will not supply enough.
9) Be fucking nice to the hotel and con staff. They are the reason we even have a convention.
10) Go to my mother fucking set, 11pm-12am on Friday! I'll be getting a hold of the convention registration list and taking down names of whomever doesn't show up to it. Said bitches will be getting stitches.
Lmao. Ember I love you :-3 You're so awesome. I hope people follow the rules XD I can't get drunk. I tried. Hah!
: Star Wonder February 19, 2013, 07:27:29 -07:00
Lmao. Ember I love you :-3 You're so awesome. I hope people follow the rules XD I can't get drunk. I tried. Hah!
i love you too :3 <3
: Ember February 19, 2013, 07:43:55 -07:00
i love you too :3 <3
Yay Love! There isn't enough of it in the world!
[admin]In response to the person(s) who reported this thread: Profanity in itself is not banned. I don't see any other reason to take moderator action.[/admin]
damn that's harsh. Hah... people trying to report the thread >>... Nothing wrong in here ^_^ Party! :-3 :birdy: O0
very sound structure of ideas to attempt following, if anyone even follows half these suggestions, their experience with be "two-fold" over not following any of it, and doing the whole list, well it will be "two-folded two-fold", which is a whole lot more than "two-fold", i`ll tell you now :)
:) :-3 :)
see all you crazy smurfing smurfs there, and you`d all better have a smurfingly smurfing good time while there or i`ll smurf you on the side of your smurfing smurf so hard, you`ll think you gone and smurfed to smurftopia.
Profanity-laced wisdom to con by.
Wonderous Ember-iffic wisdom.
I'd further add the 6-2-1 rule http://en.wikifur.com/wiki/6-2-1_rule (http://en.wikifur.com/wiki/6-2-1_rule)
Also less pre'con'ceived notions brought to the con and more just go there try things meet people. High expectations breed disappointment.
Lol, people getting butthurt by the addition of colourful language. Common sense mostly (which some people lack... and won't read this), but still humorous nonetheless.
WHERES THE LIKE BUTTON *social media is ingrained in my brain*
But seriously. Yes.
Ember, there's is no way in hell I could convey any of this better than you. Well said, good sir! I tip my hat to you.
AND SOME DAMN GOOD, F>BEEP<ING AMAZING, WORTHY OF ALL THE MOTHER-F>BEEP<ING PRAISE OF F>BEEP<ING AWESOMENESS ADVICE. TAKE NOTES, KIDS!
: Acco February 19, 2013, 05:50:33 -07:00
Lol, people getting butthurt by the addition of colourful language. Common sense mostly (which some people lack... and won't read this), but still humorous nonetheless.
[admin]we don't call people butthurt here. It was a legitimate point to bring up to the mods; that's what the report button is for.[/admin]
: HexV February 19, 2013, 06:54:09 -07:00
Ember, there's is no way in hell I could convey any of this better than you. Well said, good sir! I tip my hat to you.
AND SOME DAMN GOOD, FUCKING AMAZING, WORTHY OF ALL THE MOTHERFUCKING PRAISE OF FUCKING AWESOMENESS ADVICE. TAKE NOTES, KIDS!
Thanks! I reported your post for having curse words in it. :-3
: Ember February 19, 2013, 07:05:26 -07:00
Thanks! I reported your post for having curse words in it. :-3
What curse words? >.>
As an addendum: no starting drama with furs you used to know. :D
I say this because I'm going to be at Vancoufur and there are quite a few furs who know me but haven't seen me in quite a long time.
I'm even responsible for at least one of the current BC Furries for being active...
SUSPENSE!!!!!
*chuckles* just love the way you were direct with people about con advice. colorful as well
I gotta say out of the two versions, THIS one is my favorite :p Awesome advice, all cons should post this shit. :birdy:
I feel like any fur party could benefit from this advice.
sage advice, sir.
Ember, it seems as though Vince of Mongrels could be your friend. :P
You know, I was wondering whether the profane language could backfire and first timers not to take these statemented seriously. Yet this really gets to the point, some passages have just the needed pint of sarcasm (per se) meaning "don't mess with these rules".
Also glad someone brought up the 6-2-1 rule. Very first thing you should learn about a con.
Heh, I wish I'd followed all this advice after my first con.
Groovy~
When is Vancoufur usually?
XD I love all this profanity laced advice! I will be sure to give it to people who plan on attending their first cons from now on :birdy:
I'm kinda exempt from the getting drunk one xD
I kinda need a lot to get drunk... when I turned 19 I had 2 pints, 5 shots, 2 cocktails, 1 pitcher of beer, and 3 double Jack and Cokes... It's like reading The Very Hungry Caterpillar.
"The next day he drank 2 pints, 5 shots, 2 cocktails, 1 pitcher of beer, and 3 double Jack and Cokes. In the morning he had a hangover!"
Anywho, I didn't get too drunk or have a hangover after drinking that much, though I had a lot of fun XD
0___0 It takes me all that to get buzzed... I think I might be an Elf from The Lord Of The Rings...
I'm not even bragging either T~T Being a lightweight means you can get drunk on a six pack, being like me means you have to save up for a while before even attempting to get drunk xD Seriously, it sucks to be unable to enjoy alcohol the same way as everyone else.
: Ember February 19, 2013, 06:25:44 -07:00
<Snip>
3) Fucking hell, drugs are bad okay? But if you really decide to do them don't be super fucked up in public and try to keep it on a down low. You are creating a very fucking awkward situation for the con staff and if you have a medical emergency you might bring some serious bad press to the con.
4) Bring a pair of swim shorts. There's a heated pool.... Fuck.
</Snip>
Do not disobey #3 and then forget the shorts mentioned in #4 when you want to go for a dip in the pool, higher than the Pope. I spent my Saturday night at Rainfurrest 2013 in con-ops puzzling over what the fuck just happened with con-sec, after being jumped onto, half drowned and clawed at in the hotel pool by a buck-naked dude who was high as fuck on goodness only knows what. No joke.
Seriously. Can't emphasize it enough. Rule 3. Fucking obey rule #3.
Also, just noticed how necro'd this thread is. Oh well. Still bloody good advice. Follow this list for Rainfurrest if you're going, and add rule 11: Traveler's insurance is the difference between $30 for a weekend insured against major incidents, and $3,000 for a busted leg on the dancefloor. Obamacare does not apply to Canadians, and shockingly, not every nation bothers with conveniences like subsidized health-care.
<week before the con bump>