So I've been on these forums for a little over six months now and, I gotta say, I'm pretty fucking disappointed with what I've seen.
At first I thought it was pretty cool. A board full of people within my province and neighbouring areas who come together to discuss local topics, set-up meetings and hangouts, get to know each other and all-around feel less alone in our little corner of the furry-community. Hell yeah. This looks like an awesome place for me. And it did start-off pretty nicely. I met some really nice people here, made some new friends in neighbouring cities that I grew fond of and hang out with all the time now, found some discussion topics that were genuinely good-natured and witnessed a lot of fellow furs/dragons helping each other out.
Then I decided to try and offer some advice here and there to people that were complaining about life or legitimately asking for advice, and I got met with a little bit of defensive ire at some of my words. No problem, I understand that some people can't take advice and they are personally insulted by it. I can deal with that. I usually just leave the person alone from that point forward. But then I start getting people openly insulting me and knocking me for being an arrogant, inconsiderate asshole... and THEN I got a shit-load of "senior members" jumping in to defend the little pricks because... I dunno... they don't like me? Because I'm the new guy on the block? Because I try to find honest solutions to problems instead of sympathizing and blubbering with the person who posted the thread to simply whine about shit?
I'm all for posting threads to rant and vent and scream your head off at nobody in particular. Hell, I'm doing it right now! I know there are a lot of younger furs here and teen-angst is something that can't be avoided. Everyone went through their angst phase, even me. Sometimes it's good to get something off your chest and just flap your jaw about it, but every time I see it happen here, there's always some snob jumping in the first post to say, "Why the hell are you whining? Grow up and get over it, you snot-nozed little brat." Well fuck you, buddy; who the hell are you to tell me I can't express myself?
Well... I know a few reasons why people do it, even if they don't know it themselves. The first reason is that this place is still a high-school. I thought a little BC furs board would be a nice seclusion from the drama-loving furry community but hell, I get less drama on Fur Affinity. Everyone here wants to be the shit. Every "senior" member of the community likes to think they're some big-shot because they've been around for x years. They like to think they have some level of authority over the younger furs and that they can guide and mentor them by being an arrogant fuck to everyone else.
The other reason is that it's because this is the INTERNET. I can't reach through the monitor and slap you for being an idiot, so you're free to wear holes in your keyboard freaking out at me. Being able to type your thoughts out is empowering. You can type out everything that's on your head without anyone interrupting you to tell you you're off-track, that you have no idea what you're talking about. You feel so much better about yourself the more you type because nobody is actively debating with you, and by the time you're finished typing, you solidly believe in all the bullshit you just wrote, so when someone comes along to argue their points against you, it doesn't matter... what you said is right, right? Nothing can flip it around on you because you are your own god on the internet. I can tell you that a good 80% of you would be scared shitless to say any of the garbage you say online in a real-life encounter. I've been around the community long enough and been to enough furry meets and conventions to know that more than half the people that like to wave their arms around and scream online shrink away with their tail between their legs when I meet them in person. Not because I actively intimidate them, but because that's just the kind of pathetic individual they are. There are a lot of people here I doubt would be any different.
Now, I know there is no perfect place where only intelligent people are allowed to exist. But I thought, at the very least, that this place would be more mature than a fucking daycare. I'm actually amazed that I haven't witnessed any of the mods getting personally involved in some of the bullshit conversations I've seen here and start banning people just because they don't like them; at least there is some level of professionalism on this board.
Heh. I know as soon as I post this, there are going to be several people just foaming at the mouth... their fingers just hammering their poor keyboards to ream me out. Bring it. I wanna see how many of you immediately exemplify everything I just wrote. Hell, I wouldn't even be surprised if this thread got wiped. Fuck it. I just felt like ranting. (8<
Ok, i'll bite. i'll take the bait.
so, having a shy personality, in RL, is considered pathetic now? That's hardly a fair judgement. as an RL shy person, i'm offended by that. Yeah, maybe I wouldn't say a lot of the things I say on the boards to people in person. I don't think you'd have the balls to say that kind of shit to people in person either. But a lot of that is also the fact that when I hang out with furs, I'm trying to have a good time, not discuss some bullshit little rant on the board. I mean, big deal, some one decided to let loose and just freak out (and now I have that bad 80s/90s, whatever song stuck in my head. "Whooooaaaa FREAK OUT!"). Chances are, if I ever met you in person, I wouldn't bring this up, because what's the point? it's in the past, and really who cares? Who gives a rats ass about some random little insulting and generalizing rant you posted on the internet? Yeah, I'm offended right off the bat, but as you already pointed out, people are different on the internet because there is that sense of anonymity. I might think you're an ass on the internet and then meet you at a fur meet and decide that in person you're alright, or really cool or whatever.
Not to mention that by posting this thread you fed the drama. You even admit as much at the end of your post, which alone makes you hypocritical by calling everyone else immature, and then posting an immature ranty post just to prove it. People will either react with blind rage, as you're expecting them to, troll you, ignore it, or just say "fuck it" and contribute to your ranty trolly ways for the hell of it (case in point, me).
Also, aren't a lot of the "senior" members, and mods and whatnot in their 20s? Cuz that's really so much better than being an angsty teen. Now you're just a stressed angsty teen, with access to alcohol, and something a little more legitimate to angst about than who's taking who to prom. Yes myself included! except for the access to alcohol part... ;.;
...Stop taking life so seriously. no one gets out alive, jeez.
: EmoFox April 02, 2011, 01:26:11 -06:00
so, having a shy personality, in RL, is considered pathetic now?
No. Having a shy personality in RL and
pretending to be something you're not online and deceiving others into believing you are a totally different person is pathetic. Be the same person online as you are offline (or vise-versa) and I won't have a problem with it, whether you're mouthy, shy, bubbly, flamboyant, whatever.
See, this is what happens. People attempt to read too far into what I say. I leave openings in my words for people to insert things that I never said and they pretend that I DID say them so they can fuel themselves on a hate-campaign. It's hilarious and sad at the same time. You might not think I have the balls to repeat the things I'm saying in person but that's because you've never met me in person. I'm not going to try and defend myself against that accusation because there's no way I can prove it to you at this moment, and why would I care what people who don't know me think of me anyway? I know full-well that I've completely blacklisted myself on these forums by posting this thread, so it's not like I give a shit anyway.
Not to mention that by posting this thread you fed the drama.
You bet your ass I did. Only difference is that it wasn't my intention to do so, even though I knew it would. It was my intention to highlight the issue that is some of the people here need to keep their hurtful opinions to themselves sometimes rather than flip-out on people who are simply making a statement and hoping for some positive encouragement or constructive criticism. If I really wanted to intentionally feed drama, I would have listed-off several peoples' names that I have witnessed taking-part in these activities on these forums. Oh boy, would there have ever been a big stink about that! But no... I'm not the kind of guy who would publicly accuse someone. If I really had a problem with a certain individual, I would rather talk to them one-on-one.
And your comment on age-range is altogether irrelevant. I've met 18-year-olds more mature than myself and 50-year-olds who whine and bitch like babies to make a fuss and piss people off. Sometimes the age-filters apply; but in this case, I believe it does not.
I can do what I want with my life as long as it falls within lawful boundaries. I choose to create debates like this to allow people to analyze the issue and possibly learn something from it. The haters are the ones who only see me waving my arms and swearing, and that's fine by me; I do not want to associate with them anyway. When people like you can intelligently point-out your side of the debate, I can respect your opinions and choose whether or not to acknowledge or deny them. When others decide they want to try and smack me down and call me names, I can decide that I don't give two shits about them and I will remove them from my mind.
Thank you for providing legitimate views to debate my own instead of simply insulting me. It was not my intention to insult anyone in particular, though I know that people were bound to be offended by my opinions and I'm willing to accept the fallout.
Honestly, I try to avoid the threads/boards asking for that kind of help, because, well - that's what happens. It's harsh, I know, but I'm not going to feed that kind of drama (ESPECIALLY if it's relationship-related. Ugh. x.x). That said, I have no problem offering my advice, insight, or even a shoulder to cry on for the friends that I've met on here or otherwise. But only my friends. ;)
The boards are awesome to skim through and see who you really wouldn't mind hanging out with, and who you should learn to avoid. Plan events, show off your art and writing and music (but beware of trolling 'criticisms' just like on FA). But there are definitely people with issues on here and elsewhere, and that's life, I guess. *shrug* I try not to let it get to me, and instead like to rant about stupid technology things and stuff. XD
Now I know that this was not a main point of your post, but I'd like to make a comment on this:
: Naetholix April 02, 2011, 02:42:42 -06:00
No. Having a shy personality in RL and pretending to be something you're not online and deceiving others into believing you are a totally different person is pathetic. Be the same person online as you are offline (or vise-versa) and I won't have a problem with it,.
To many furries, a character represents a different person that they play out as escapist fun. The whole point of having a character or two is that they get to play out a side of life that they normally do not. To these people, if their character was exactly the same as their real life personality, then there would be no point at all to what they were doing.
Ember has a point.
Being shy (for me anyway) isn't a permanent thing. The person I am online is the person most of my friends know me as. But in large groups or when just meeting some one for the first time, I'm incredibly shy. I wouldn't say this kind of stuff at a fur meet in person because you're right, I don't know you. I don't know what you're going to be offended by, and I don't want to offend people in a face-to-face environment because I don't know how they'll react. I'm safe on the internet in the fact that if I say something some one doesn't like, the worst they can do is troll me. If I say something wrong in person, and that person just so happens to have an anger problem or something, I could end up in the hospital, which is not a fun experience. It's risk assessment. I can be my mouthy, stubborn, opinionated self on the internets because you can't break my legs for doing so.
Also, you contradict yourself. The last paragraph of your first post suggests that you had at least the slightest intention of causing drama to laugh at people.
Sorry to burst your bubble Ember but my characters have the same personality as my own.
And Naetholix if you think the boards were great 6 months ago? They were way better a year or a couple years ago. When there were monthly fur meets and everyone got along better than they do now.
Also as for the being shy IRL and being social on the internet. Look at 4chan. Most of the people posting crap on there are probably people who are shy losers in real life. It's a normal thing on today's internet. People can say and do as they please. Trolling is no different. And sorry to say but I am also shy in person.I don't even post on here much but I still make contributions to this site because what's the point of being a member if I didn't?
And as for the advice thing, yeah I know people throw a big stink about it. Look at my thread where I stood up for the females. Many people bawww'd over it because they didn't like what I had to say, or what other peoples feedbacks were. It's very normal on a board like this.
And you won't find no drama or less drama anywhere. Wherever you go there will be drama. Maybe not the same kind, but there will ALWAYS be drama.
Also saying you're not trying to cause drama and then say BRING IT at the end of your post is contradicting don't you think? It's just ENCOURAGING people to start drama.
The only way you can lower the drama is to not post threads like these. It is obvious that you were trying to start drama on purpose.
I am not a mean person nor am I trying to start a fight with you. I am just saying things the way they are.
: Wrath April 02, 2011, 06:09:52 -06:00
Sorry to burst your bubble Ember but my characters have the same personality as my own.
I was speaking in generalities, dummy :p
One person not fitting the case doesn't at all discredit it.
Troll disguised as internet tough-guy = 1
BCFurries = -482
As long as you're not generalizing everyone on this board by what you've seen from a few, then I'm okay with what's being said here.
I agree with Wrath though that this board was better a year or two ago when there weren't many people here. Now it's too many people with different views on everything. It's basically why I don't post here much anymore. Pretty much anything you post that someone doesn't like will immediately become a frustrating, passive-aggressive, battle of wits.
/nerd drama rage
Without a specific instance in mind, there is not much I can say about this. . . ???
I find that for me, as long as I ignore all drama and those keen on starting it, it doesn't exist.
: Zythren April 03, 2011, 12:14:57 -06:00
As long as you're not generalizing everyone on this board by what you've seen from a few, then I'm okay with what's being said here.
I agree with Wrath though that this board was better a year or two ago when there weren't many people here. Now it's too many people with different views on everything. It's basically why I don't post here much anymore. Pretty much anything you post that someone doesn't like will immediately become a frustrating, passive-aggressive, battle of wits.
A collection of people who might have differing views on things from you is called a "community." That's kind of how they work.
Diversity is not a bad thing, from my viewpoint.
(http://i56.tinypic.com/29ktkxh.jpg)
KA-BOOOOOOOOOOOOM!
Also i'd like to say that there's nothing stopping us from making BCF as good as it was X years ago again.
People need to cheer up.
or do what i did and meditate for a while, it worked for me and I'm much happier.
Also, pessimism does not an excuse make to my post
Ember: I understand where you're coming from and I'd like to say that you have a point, but consider this: When people are whining and bitching at me for things that I say on the internet, they are not whining and bitching as their characters. Think of it like, when you hear someone talking about another person behind his/her back. The person ranting will go on and on about how much they hate so-and-so and how he'd love "show him/her a thing or two," but when that person actually shows up, the ranter shuts its mouth tighter than a nun's vagina. It's pretty much the same thing, and I think that it's pathetic.
And I love how everyone is pointing their fingers at me and calling me a hypocrite. Who gives a shit whether or not I intentionally stirred the pot so in order to cause those who would take the bait to rise to the surface? It worked, didn't it? I now can watch as people spring forth to say something witty and abrasive in a childish demeanour, in-turn only labelling themselves as someone I need not waste my time talking to. And the best part is the fact that whether or not I did intentionally attempt to cause a ruckus is completely irrelevant! Whether or not I purposefully said words that I knew would glean a negative, dramatic response from people has absolutely no bearing on the fact that those who ARE responding as such would have done it anyway, regardless the tone I left on. Everyone is so quick to look at the guy on his soap-box and start calling him a lunatic even if the things he is shouting about are right.
Oh hell yeah, I'm an asshole. Oh hell yeah, I'm being a big, fat meanie. Whatever. I already know that most of you think I'm a hypocrite loudmouth piece of shit and I really don't give a fuck. Everyone is sitting here trying to psycho-analyze ME instead of actually reading-into what I wrote and it's sad. If you want someone to point fingers at and bitch about, so be it. I'll gladly be that guy. Every community needs one, don't they?
Yes, but we already have FIVE. Come on!
I also think you're wrong that no one's reading into what you've said. The thing is, it's already been said. A LOT. Like, oh my GOD, god forbid people act like people. Everything you've stated in your original post is already well known amongst most people who use the internet, let alone this forum, so why do you feel the need to bring it up again? Really? Why? Show of paws, how many furs here already knew that everyone on this board acts like a total jackass sometimes? Acts like they're still in high school, and a total drama queen? I can admit it. I troll for the sake of trolling (usually on omegle) because it amuses me.
Ever heard the quote 'Be the change you wish on the world'? or however it goes. That essentially means If you want change then CHANGE. Lead by example. All that good stuff. Yeah, not everyone's going to listen or follow along, but at least then you're not adding to the drama and douchebaggery that obviously infuriates you.
Also have to disagree with you Zetta; there's one big thing stopping us from having this board how great it apparently was X many years ago. Everyone's attitude of how lame it is now, and how much greater it was back then. When it was only so many people? like what, a group of friends who got along all the time and everything was super awesome fun time with rainbows and unicorns?!
I'd like to think my point has been made, but i'm sure that my frustration got the better of me and now I will be the troll... *sigh*
Emo I love you to pieces, but please, take my advice:
Stop feeding the trolls!
When folks spew out these bursty "OMG" type threads, they are looking for one thing, the responses. They like to be the "asshole(s)" of a forum. I really have no idea why they do this.. boredom, they think it's funny.. I dunno... Anyway, I've been around long enough to know that and the best way to stop them from posting is to ignore them!
P.S. I still luv you to pieces x3
X3 i knoooow but they're the only ones who argue with me anymore. ;.;
I seriously don't recomend this, but if you want to argue, go play Graal online.
i regret spending years playing that game.
you say anything and people have a habit of becoming opinionated entrepreneurs
: Zetta April 03, 2011, 10:01:55 -06:00
I seriously don't recomend this, but if you want to argue, go play Graal online.
i regret spending years playing that game.
you say anything and people have a habit of becoming opinionated entrepreneurs
Omg lol I remember playing that game.
Drama drama slightly fun more drama.
: EmoFox April 03, 2011, 09:33:36 -06:00
X3 i knoooow but they're the only ones who argue with me anymore. ;.;
:P
"Drama" is a difficult thing to define. Which is why me and the other moderators try to give some leeway in this regard. Sometimes someone questioning assumptions that the group takes for granted can be a good thing.
But leeway can go too far, and judging from recent discussions it may have gone on too far. There is a discussion about what direction to take, in Forum Help, and we're open to feedback.
If I thought the people who brought this up were trolls, I would have locked or deleted it long ago.
You shouldn't run blindly into a herde with no target. If people are targeting you, target them back. If it continues on, then start having fun and personalizing your opinions againts theres'. Really good stuff.
Yeah, tell me about it. There's like 90% incidence of emoness and drama in the furry fandom. When they cry to me, and if I know it's very trivial, i'll give them some advice, if they don't listen, I won't give them any sympathy >:|
"boohoooo, I'm so lonely! I have no friends D: What can I do???"
"well, you can start by cheering up, nobody likes someone who's down all the time"
"boohoooooo, theres nothing to cheer up forr, waaahhh"
"yeah ok, ur right, bai!"
But still, you gotta do it politely. Great care is needed when saying something or else internet white knights will be all "yo, ur wrong, bro"
And then you'd be like, "no i'm not"
And then they're all, "yeah you are"
Yeh... comes from experience =p
: z00p April 04, 2011, 02:01:28 -06:00
Yeah, tell me about it. There's like 90% incidence of emoness and drama in the furry fandom. When they cry to me, and if I know it's very trivial, i'll give them some advice, if they don't listen, I won't give them any sympathy >:|
"boohoooo, I'm so lonely! I have no friends D: What can I do???"
"well, you can start by cheering up, nobody likes someone who's down all the time"
"boohoooooo, theres nothing to cheer up forr, waaahhh"
"yeah ok, ur right, bai!"
But still, you gotta do it politely. Great care is needed when saying something or else internet white knights will be all "yo, ur wrong, bro"
And then you'd be like, "no i'm not"
And then they're all, "yeah you are"
Yeh... comes from experience =p
That's a pretty shitty field to have experience in xD
I usually just don't bother even talking to them unless I'm already friends with them.
Seems to work out pretty well :P
Hey, when you're got nothing to do but hit the intarnet forums all day, you eventually wanna start throwing feces around at people (figuratively!)
*p00z out some jelly beans and starts throwing them at pplz* 83
: mediar April 03, 2011, 08:11:30 -06:00
When folks spew out these bursty "OMG" type threads, they are looking for one thing, the responses. They like to be the "asshole(s)" of a forum. I really have no idea why they do this.. boredom, they think it's funny.. I dunno... Anyway, I've been around long enough to know that and the best way to stop them from posting is to ignore them!
Actually, I believe it's more so because we "assholes" get sick of watching the same people make the same mistakes and hurt other individuals with their ignorance. We watch the "ignore it and it will go away," bullshit try and fail; we watch the light-hearted attempts at "killing with kindness" go tits-up, and we discover that the only way to get peoples' attention is to verbally slap them in the face with a big, rotten zucchini coated in lime. Even if it doesn't fix it, at the very least, it allows the accused to step-up and make a complete idiot out of themselves in the public eye by trying fruitlessly to defend their damaged pride so people can watch and be like, "Hey, that guy's kinda dumb! I'm going to preserve my intelligence and stay the fuck away from him!" 8D
And if you think I'm going to stop posting here because I've managed to get people pissed off at me, you're sadly mistaken. As far as I know, I haven't broken any forum rules; I haven't directly attacked anyone. I still enjoy posting here and I'm going to continue to do so in what I believe to be a respectful manner. If you take exception to that, feel free to PM me any time to discuss my methods of discussion and debate. I had a gripe that I wanted to kvetch about and I did just that. Some engaged me with intelligent feedback and some decided to just call me a troll and pretend like I don't know what I'm talking about.
I don't do this shit because I'm bored. I do this shit because I don't enjoy sitting around watching people get away with being true, inconsiderate assholes to others with no provocation, and as long as I have to bear witness to it, I'm going to intervene. Fucking sue me for "repeating what's already been said," obviously it needs to be said again and again and again because some people just don't get it. I like to think it's possible to calmly negotiate with people when they're acting like retards, but sometimes they need to hear the cut-and-dry ugly truth to make the rusty old gears start turning.
So then why not get their individual attention and PM them? Because honestly, as far as I know, i'm not one of the people you're ranting about, and I don't give a rats ass about other people choosing to be stupid on the internet. That's their problem, and it'll cause them problems through their life, so why do I need to get involved? I can understand the frustration of people being asshats, but if you're going to call them out on it have the balls to do it properly instead of hiding behind a generalizing post saying "certain people are being asshats, and you all suck for tolerating it." Why not PM them and say "why are you being such an asshat?" or at least trying to understand it from their point of view, because I'm willing to bet most of them don't think they're being asshats. Like Reistark, he's been called out as being an asshat, a few times if I'm not mistaken. Then he started the aspergers thread, people said "you're still an asshat" he acknowledged the fact, and I don't think anything else all that important was said, but I have noticed he's been a little less of an asshat. an yes Asshat is the word of the day, thanks for noticing.
So basically, instead of posting another "OMG DRAMA" thread, why not deal with it in the same mature manner that you're asking these people to act with in the first place? if you fight fire with fire all you're going to do is burn down the town. An eye for an eye leaves everyone blind. And more often than not hearing the "cut and ugly truth" in a rant as you've posted it is just going to piss them off for being targeted, if they realize they're even being targeted, and only bring to worsen the situation. In short, slapping them in the face with a rotten lime covered zucchini is only going to make it worse. Like running through a room full of starving dogs while wearing a suit made entirely out of fresh cut beef steaks. it's a bad idea.
So if you claim to not give a rat's ass, then why are you continuing this post-rally with me? I'm not trying to discourage you from doing so, but in trying so hard to point me out for being a hypocrite, you're starting to toe the line yourself here. I actually don't mind hearing what you have to say because you actually do a good job of arguing your views even if you are trying to pick me apart.
And just a question: how could you possibly know whether or not I send PMs to people regarding specific issues brought up between them and myself? I assure you that I do, in fact, exercise my ability to write PMs towards individuals and that's only if I don't feel like calling them out in the very thread that the issue surfaced in the first place.
I'm done trying to defend my stance here because all I'm going to do is repeat over and over again that this isn't about me. I stand by my methods of implementation of my views and you may very well continue to try and psychoanalyze me off my soap-box.
: Naetholix April 02, 2011, 02:42:42 -06:00
No. Having a shy personality in RL and pretending to be something you're not online and deceiving others into believing you are a totally different person is pathetic. Be the same person online as you are offline (or vise-versa) and I won't have a problem with it, whether you're mouthy, shy, bubbly, flamboyant, whatever.
OMFG...seriously, there are too many furries like this...It
IS pathetic, I'm behind you 100% there Naeth. >:( Sure, some people can't deal with large crowds and are much better with one or two people...but really, unless you are actually playing another character online, such as some claim, then maybe there should be a discrepancy where one would place an 'OOC' so people will know when the REAL person is actually saying something that can be taken for the truth. You can't expect people to take you seriously if you are say, shy, but go about talking up a storm like you are some tough-assed-who-knows-what wanna be online, the when faced with reality you back off and run away because the truth comes out. A lot of furries don't clarify if they are actually playing the character they WANT to be vs someone they actually ARE. The neat thing is, some of us can pick this shit out a mile away. Usually the ones who talk the big tough talk are the same ones who run and log off when you slap them with the truth.
The problem with expecting everyone to behave the same online and off is that people almost invariably feel safer in an online environment.
People feel like they can express their true feelings, opinions and desires in the online environment because they aren't going to be judged as harshly, if at all. Some of those have fantasies that can only be realized in an online environment, and those fantasies are often accompanied by a change in behaviour and perceived personality.
Getting to know someone online may actually be getting to know them better than you think. A person's behaviour offline may seem to indicate otherwise but for better or worse, deep down their online personality is probably a better reflection of who they really are.
Hey I'm all for expressing one's true feelings as long as everyone knows it's the actual person they are hearing, and not a character they are posing as. HUGE DIFFERENCE. When you end up talking to someone who is posing, and they're not being honest about it, that can be harmful to the one who is being duped...giving some facade of something that isn't true. Playing a character and whatever fantasies involved with that character is great, as long as it's done in an area where everyone knows it's an actual role play, and everyone is on the same card table, so to speak.
The fact that people feel safer online than off I guess, is a personal opinion, because there is a lot more crap online to actually view. Anyone and everyone can get in their jabs, so it's not necessarily a safer spot.
Everything said online is RP, and not actually what the person believes.
A lot of the times in furry-land, this is the case. Sad, but true. Kinda makes it hard to form any kind of trust, doesn't it?
Yeah, I agree with taiga as well.
I know a few people online.. who live in this.. made up fantasy world where they are totally disconnected from reality. Any queries into their 'real life' is met with an aggressive defense, or just altogether ignoring the question. Every time I talk to them, they'd talk the same way, trying to act all cute or in character or what not, but I kinda already know the guy is a harsh liar. Then you've got all these people who pretend to be female and lie about it for whatever reason I don't know. Too many.
I just wish they were real with themselves... srsly.
I don't want to talk about hugs and glomps and happy things weeeeeeeeee everytime I talk to you, no, I want to talk to YOU.
: Taiga April 04, 2011, 05:39:12 -06:00
Hey I'm all for expressing one's true feelings as long as everyone knows it's the actual person they are hearing, and not a character they are posing as. HUGE DIFFERENCE.
This. I don't like it when I am talking to a "character" online and it isn't the true thoughts and feelings of the person I am talking to. I talk as MYSELF online and like to talk to others that are being themselves. Sure, I am a little more outspoken online... but everything I say, I mean. :P
It's too bad more people don't do this, because it really does nothing more than to feed the FAKE beast. I can count on one hand the people who I trust, who are furry, that are actually who they are online as they are offline. The rest...pathetic. There's one thing in this world that breaks trust more than anything. Lying about who you are.
I know there are people who say they are the same offline as they are online, but will not prove this. Like z00p mentioned, as soon as you so much as ask or dig a little to find the truth, you get smacked with anger, avoidance, or more lies. :roll: Good way to promote trust.
The only thing I don't tell the truth about online is my real name... mostly because I hate it and want to change it legally. :P People that get commissions from me and pay through PayPal know my real name, since I only use it where I have to. Everything else though is real.
I always think of my grandma who says "Everyone lies on the Internet!!!" and when I say that I don't, she likes to break out with "Well, do you tell people your weight?!" ... as if people online will really care how much I weigh. Then again, who walks up to people IRL and goes "Hi, my name is *name*, how much do you weigh?" *rolls eyes*
I too hate it when I am talking to a "character" online when I am trying to have an intelligent serious conversation with them. I never use my characters as a way to run away from my true personality. And even if I did speak as my characters, it wouldn't really change a thing cuz they are me in animal form. None of the personality's been changed. Only physical appearance in the roleplaying world. I'm happy with my personality, so I don't see why I should hide under a mask.
: Wrath April 04, 2011, 08:50:14 -06:00
I'm happy with my personality, so I don't see why I should hide under a mask.
Here here! Give the girl a Mai Tai! :thumbs:
So are we at the part where we put away the torches and pitchforks or are we still an angry mob because the internet is the ultimate placebo
Internet is for Porn. ;D
: Taiga April 04, 2011, 09:04:07 -06:00
Internet is for Porn. ;D
And thus the ipad was born
Posers use them too though. Invasion of the posers! Must be eradicated! :police:
Agreed, and then hipsters are next.
BECAUSE YOU'RE SO UNDERGROUND, YOU'VE SURFACED OUT THE OTHER SIDE OF THE PLANET AND BECAME MAINSTREAM.
AGAIN.
Posers & Hipsters...yeah I can go with that. The easy part about a hipster is you can see them a mile away. The Posers are more elusive and it's more fun extricating them from the group...ah yes, watch those little bastard squirm as they are exposed for the lying heathens that they are. :thumbs:
thats the last time I take a nap in the middle of the afternoon, XD
The only thing I disagree with is the generalization that everyone who is different on the internet than they are in person is a poser. I can guarantee you that I'm a different person on these forums than I am at furmeets (gizmo's parties). I'm far more opinionated and in your face. But again, you can't break my legs over the internet. So part of it is because I do feel safer. Even then I'm discrete in what I share, for various reasons, including the possibility of actually meeting some of you people. I really do better in smaller groups, or one on one. I'd like to think that most anyone who's met me can vouch for that fact.
And to answer Naetholix, for starters, it's rare to find a "troll" who trolls with intelligence and has an actual argument instead of just going to personal attacks. Usually it's "that's an ignorant statement for these reasons." and they respond with "you're an idiot, you're a whore, you don't know anything because you're a woman" etc. etc. So... mostly because I'm actually enjoying the debate. :p
I can accept that some people play a different card online than they do offline. What I don't accept is the fact that if someone is shy and reserved offline, given a system where they can go out into the internet and then turn around and do things like you say, opinionated and in your face, because they can hide behind the safety of the internet...well, that only goes so far. Safety only goes so far, because if someone takes offense at what you say, sees it as a veiled threat, or even an actual blatant threat, you can still have the cops at your door. One fur on here actually pulled that and had that happen to him. Or, you get the ones who talk the big talk, yap off and say all kinds of things, then when told to step up to the plate and back up what they say, they log off in fear and are on the phone calling the cops because they stirred up a hornet's nest with their stupid diatribe, again, veiled behind their safe computer, and cry to the cops that someone threatened them, when they were the ones who initiated it! >:( Oh...oh... and then get back on and cry that they are innocent, that they were being bullied, again, caused by their own hand or should I say, mouth? It's easy to sit behind a computer and spew off all kinds of shit, talk a big talk, give advice on shit that they have no idea on what they are talking about, get called on it because it's so damned obvious that it's a load of crap, then cry foul, because they got exposed...and then try to peg it on someone else. That is still a POSER. If you can't put your money where your mouth is, then that is a POSER. Someone who spews off death threats or physical violence on the internet, then given the chance to make good on that supposed threat, or to be given the chance to prove how tough they are, instead runs off or gives all kinds of excuses as to why they won't. Step it up a notch, and have the person that was being threatened by the one who was doing the threatening actually be in the same town as the one who made the threats, and the cops get called by the one who initially made the threats!! POSER!! Seriously, this shit does still happen! It's disgusting, pathetic, and I'll repeat, if someone can't put their money where their mouth is, POSER. >:(
: Taiga April 05, 2011, 07:29:28 -06:00
I can accept that some people play a different card online than they do offline. What I don't accept is the fact that if someone is shy and reserved offline, given a system where they can go out into the internet and then turn around and do things like you say, opinionated and in your face, because they can hide behind the safety of the internet...well, that only goes so far.
Like I said, people can, and will behave differently online because it's an environment where they feel safer.
: TaigaSafety only goes so far, because if someone takes offense at what you say, sees it as a veiled threat, or even an actual blatant threat, you can still have the cops at your door.
This is a bit extreme though. Do some people take it a bit far? Sure. But even some of the most arrogant over-confident people online will have the common sense of their off-line counterparts. They'll read what they've typed and know when they've crossed a line. Those few who don't probably don't belong here or in some cases, anywhere on the internet.
: TaigaSomeone who spews off death threats or physical violence on the internet, then given the chance to make good on that supposed threat, or to be given the chance to prove how tough they are, instead runs off or gives all kinds of excuses as to why they won't. Step it up a notch, and have the person that was being threatened by the one who was doing the threatening actually be in the same town as the one who made the threats, and the cops get called by the one who initially made the threats!! POSER!! Seriously, this shit does still happen! It's disgusting, pathetic, and I'll repeat, if someone can't put their money where their mouth is, POSER. >:(
While I in no way support posting death threats on the internet, you have to remember that this is just that: The Internet. Anywhere between 90-99% of what you read is bullshit. This doesn't make posting them any more right or take away any of the culpability from those who choose to threaten others, but it should at least offer some perspective.
While it's not always easy to distinguish the real from the fake, when you can you're better served by simply ignoring the it. These are people whose personalities you likely will not be able to change, trying will only frustrate you further.
Yeah, it is frustrating. :roll: We have one here on this board. :birdy:
These types of people who have been told time and again to get help, but refuse to, come up with excuse after excuse as to why they won't, say incredibly hurtful things to people who are innocent and then can't understand why people get mad at them for being such an idiot. Frustrating that people like this can go through life like they have, and pull the wool over so many eyes with the lies and bullshit. Then whine they are being bullied when someone points out how dumb they are being, try to play innocent. I know I've been called meekrat, a slut, a bitch, I should be killed and I will be killed if they ever get their hands on me, I'm not a female...I'm a thing, a cunt...and this all by the same person, nonetheless. :D Kinda shows you the mentality of what you are dealing with on here. Oh, and when you hit a nerve, called the truth, they go whining to the admins that they are being targeted for bullying. WHAT?! Last time I checked, being called on a lie or being called an idiot for actually blatantly being one by acting such, hurting people due to that stupidity, as it has, wasn't bullying. That is a direct attempt to take the spotlight off of them and onto someone else, but hey, that seems to be quite typical of a yellow-bellied snake, right? But, I'll go back to this: The way people like this come onto boards and portray a completely different thing. They come on with *hugs tightly* *hugs and nuzzles* you know, all of the cutsie wootsie stuff that we are known for, get everyone feeling warm and fuzzy, hoping to win someone over etc, etc...then for whatever reason someone spots something not right. Calls them on it. Guilty party spazzes and tries to whatever avail to blame someone else. And low and behold, at some point you actually meet this person in real life, they figure out who you are, and they get the hell out of Dodge with or without their clothes. :D
My response is still the same. Don't write out a cheque with your mouth if you can't cash it with your body. There's no reason to be something you're not on the internet unless you are engaging in an RP. That doesn't mean to say that everyone is playing charades, ok? yeah sure there are plenty of people who are mild an dshy in public, give them a computer and a room to themselves and they can turn into Attila the Hun. Just remember though that when you do say stuff on the internet, it is the internet, yes...but shit can still come back and bite you in the ass. Cops nowadays are taking internet threats as serious as any other verbal threat these days. just that when they see 'furry' in front of it, they'll more than likely laugh. Unless, of course, it is so blatantly bad that you can't push it off as juvenile fights in the sandbox.
: Naetholix April 02, 2011, 02:42:42 -06:00
No. Having a shy personality in RL and pretending to be something you're not online and deceiving others into believing you are a totally different person is pathetic. Be the same person online as you are offline (or vise-versa) and I won't have a problem with it, whether you're mouthy, shy, bubbly, flamboyant, whatever.
Ehhh... dude, half the people you associate with around FA are arrogant pretenders who solely FEED off of their "seniority" and the popularity of them/ their friends have in this fandom. To say other people are pathetic for the same reason (not arguing the point that shallow low lives with complexes are kinda pathetic) does seem a bit hypocritical.
I don't think I really need to bring up any examples here....
THAT being said... there is ONE, UNO, SINGLE... good thing that comes with being around the fandom for X years (and its NOT the elitist mindset of thinking your god) and thats the simple notion that you can walk around expecting drama and being able to side step it instead running head strong into it.. im not saying to pussy foot around, but joining the fray does kinda hurt ones argument when the wording treads the line of "so many people here are immature jackasses and stir up drama!" because said argument is simply adding to the drama and really accomplishing nothing in the end. (GAH side tracked..) what I am getting at is, in the fandom you really gotta kinda expect shit to happen and people to argue and not get along, humanity as a whole is the exact same way in in the end no matter how much of a Dragon/ Otherkin/ Furry lifestyle-er/ fanboy/ Popular you are you are still just another person in this world soley defeined by a general interest in animals and anthropomorphic creatures. You tend to come out more pleasantly surprised when you meet the real nice furs who are not just around cause you do good art or have connections with people who draw eye popping porn. (or do nothing but commission it)
I use to freaking EXPLODE on forums when I was like 16-20, I let myself get sucked right into the heart of the drama (perhaps I am just doing the same here) but these days, really it takes a lot more to get to me and some fur, no matter if he is a art god, a forum mod, or just a new guy to the fandom really makes me give a shit about their words if they are just slander and babble because in the end this is the internet, they are all just regular people and no matter how many cock sucks one amasses or how many forums they moderate at, its all just dick jerking in the wind for the sake of dick jerking to look impressive.
This all sounds very personal. Is this really something that needs a public thread?
When I asked for an example I didn't think it would change the whole topic to revolve around one instance.
I can tell you, this isn't one instance, it happens quite a fair bit. :o
This is the first I have heard about anything like that happening here. I'm sure it happens in many places all over the internet, but I have never read anything like that on this forum. ???
: Renwaldo April 05, 2011, 02:57:28 -06:00
This is the first I have heard about anything like that happening here. I'm sure it happens in many places all over the internet, but I have never read anything like that on this forum. ???
Every once in a blue moon it happens, its happened at every fur forum I have been at the past.. god knows how long. Its really a par-for-the-course kinda thing, no decent sized forum ever wins the flame/ drama free award because its an award that really doesn't exist in the first place.
Not to sound like im just dumping it all on your head as if to say "ze world is shit, get to know this" I just mean that after a while you don't really pay much attention to the outbursts and the like.
It's happened on other furry boards where bans had to be put in place. Actually, come to think of it, it's not just furry boards it's motorcycle boards etc. this has taken place on. Maybe the reason you haven't 'seen' it on here is because the radar isn't set low enough. :D
This is completely irrelevant but its one of those weird things that i thought about once, and then felt like doing my bad MS paint shooping. like i did with that back to the future thing from a long time ago which people probably don't remember
(http://i458.photobucket.com/albums/qq304/Enkuden/Claire-Farron-Lightning-1600x1200-400x300.jpg)
Not meaning anything negative but considering i don't really know much about you but comparing your avatar to the way you act in this thread seriously made me think of lightning from ff13 xD
Are my photoshop skills amazing or what
YeahIProbablyShouldn'tPostInThisThreadAnymore..
It's ok, Zetta, really. :) I'm just not shy to say what I think, and call things when things need to be said. A lot of the times I will speak up when nobody else will, but in this instance I am agreeing with Naeth. He brought up a lot of good points that I can agree with, so I stood up to make sure that it's not just him voicing something that is actually truth, and does happen. The sad part is that many people tend to just ignore things like this, when others get hurt by individuals who are less than stable. That is when I take offense. I can get along with just about anybody, I just don't put up with bullshit. :thumbs:
I dunno, I think one of the reasons we haven't seen anything as severe as death threats and whatnot is probably because no one on the board is immature enough, or dramatic enough. to go that far. I'm pretty sure most people can tell when they've crossed a line, and most of the people on the board are good for telling people when they've crossed a line, or will report them when they continue crossing said line. A good example of such is the "standing up for females" thread, in which several people were told they crossed the line, not only in the OP, but further in the thread where they continued making asses of themselves and they were reported for it. Unfortunately, this is also a good example of the point I think Naetholix was trying to make in the first place(i think), as I believe the mods/admins didn't really do anything about it, and I'm not quite sure why.
: EmoFox April 05, 2011, 06:39:14 -06:00
I dunno, I think one of the reasons we haven't seen anything as severe as death threats and whatnot is probably because no one on the board is immature enough, or dramatic enough. to go that far.
You'd be surprised...
I'm pretty sure most people can tell when they've crossed a line, and most of the people on the board are good for telling people when they've crossed a line, or will report them when they continue crossing said line.
Yeah, MOST people. The thing that happens a lot is that when someone gets pointed out for being a dick, and that person goes onto a messenger of sorts and starts to make threats that way, off the board, even when the incident in question was board related. Flying under the radar, so to speak. ;)
A good example of such is the "standing up for females" thread, in which several people were told they crossed the line, not only in the OP, but further in the thread where they continued making asses of themselves and they were reported for it. Unfortunately, this is also a good example of the point I think Naetholix was trying to make in the first place(i think), as I believe the mods/admins didn't really do anything about it, and I'm not quite sure why.
I don't envy the position of the mods or admins, really. It's a very thankless job, and you're in a 'shit if you do shit if you don't' situation. You try to appease some, and end of pissing others. There is no happy medium, and you can't please everyone. I've seen some ugly shit go down and staff get blamed for not doing this or not doing that. They don't get paid to do any of this. Sometimes what gets tagged as 'a little mishap' can be pushed asunder because it's no big deal, but others take offense and then you have a shit storm. I'm sure they have their reasons for doing what they do, and how they do it.
Ahh see, if it's happening through a messenger then it's not really ON the board. Which would also explain why i've never experienced it; I don't ad people to my msn that I don't know. except that one time because the email was similar to a friend of mine's and it turned out to be a porn bot. I'd like to believe there aren't a lot of bat-shit crazy people on this board that are like that though...
As for being an admin, yeah, I don't envy them either. But at the same time, i'm a scorpio, so a lot of my rules and whatnot would be very black and white, haha. I tend to have less grey areas, :p more hard ass 'fuck you, you broke the rules ass hole'
You guys so far have been lucky here to not have to witness such juvenile acts of stupidity, then. All I can say is, you can't take people at face value on forums. I'd like to trust people more than I do, but when I see REAL innocent people get fucked over by some schmuck who can't fuck their way out of a wet paper bag, then go and blame someone else for their misgivings, I'll stomp them into the ground with both feet.
I'll give you an example of such a rude, stupid and immature act.
Guy one is jealous of guy two because guy two is really good friends with girl 1. Guy one goes and says on a forum that guy two is a useless piece of shit, a kiddie rapist, and needs to be killed. Guy two comes back and tells guy one to bring it on. Guy one comes back with more shit to the effect of guy two is lucky to live far away or guy one would kill him. Girl one talks to guy one and tells him to smarten the hell up and quit acting like a dick. Guy one shits all over girl on and tells her that she is vermin like guy two and that she can't be trusted. Guy one gets a warning from staff. ***** Guy two posts he lost his father due to cancer. Girl one tells guy two that if he needs to call her to feel free to, and offers comfort. Guy one remarks to guy two that he deserves to lose his father. Forum members pile up on guy one, guy one gets banned from forum.
This actually did happen. It's amazing what links people send you when really stupid people do really stupid things. :o All I can say is, be very wary of people who come across as sweet and quiet and trying to butter you up...and you get an odd feeling. They aren't what they seem. The real nasty is that girls have the tendency to fall for suckers like this, feel sorry for them, and the next thing they know, they're getting hit on, then called every thing in the book by this douchebag when they don't fall for it and someone happens to bring them up to speed. >:(
I can agree with that; you really shouldn't take people for face value on forums. But not necessarily because they're a poser, more because everyone's different on the internet. That's where the difference of opinion is. Not everyone who's an ass online is a pussy offline. Again talking about myself, I am quiet and reserved in person. But give me a reason to beat the shit out of you and I will. you'll get a warning first, but thats about it. Where as when i'm online, i'm probably more likely to pick a fight.
There's nothing wrong with standing up for what you believe, in fact, more people need to do it. Just don't bullshit about things to gain attention. This is where the furry fandom gets so many emo attention whores. It's like it's overridden with these parasites. I guess it's a matter of personal opinion, like you said. With me, if someone wants to yap off at me, be prepared to get it right back. I think that's why a lot of people don't get in my face because I don't back down and will defend my beliefs to the death.
Renwaldo: You mean to tell me you haven't seen threads on this forum where someone makes a harmless complaint about their personal lives or someone gives some legitimate advice to another and has it thrown back in their face covered in tar and lit on fire with spikes and broken glass glued to it? Check your PM inbox, I'll link you to a couple that I can think of off the top of my head.
People are still kinda under/overanalyzing what I originally wrote, it seems. Here, let me try to summarize it in short:
I noticed a gradual increase in heavily-belittling posts made to individuals who were only trying to be nice or get some thoughts off their chest. It may have been because there has been a recent influx of "poor me" posts and people are getting sick of them; however, I do not see how it is justified to openly and publicly cut into someone for expressing their views. I was reading a few of the newer ones (new within the last few weeks) and the amount of bullying and insulting remarks I was seeing was making me angry, and I decided to make a thread to bring some awareness to the fact that some people were being real assholes (even bigger than myself) and possibly needed to pause and do a self-check.
I said a few things that made me sound like I was talking cash and I probably was at the time. I'm used to speaking like this in a real-life scenario; I'm not afraid to tell someone they need to stop and analyze themselves before I have to get militant even if it might spark a violent reaction from that person, as long as there is a chance they might actually listen and understand. That same attitude bled through into the sentences of my OP even though I was speaking to a general audience.
I don't care what audience I'm saying it to, I'm still going to say it. It JUST SO HAPPENS that this is a furry-establishment and people automatically defaulted to the whole "Oh you should already KNOW this would happen because it's the FURRY COMMUNITY." I don't care. I'll do this anywhere that I have a presence. I put up with so much bullying in my elementary/middle-school years that I decided to toughen-up and do something to fight back, and I did. It didn't stop there; I intervened when I saw kids who I'd never even met, being picked-on and beat-up, because I knew how much it hurt, and not just physically.
I know people are going to read that and call me a poser-white-knight. I can't really defend myself because these people didn't grow up with me and I can't possibly prove what I'm saying. It won't stop me from saying it, because I know it's true. I was a fat little nerdy kid who cried a lot when people were mean to me because I didn't understand how or why someone could be so cruel, and crying only drew more attention to myself from kids who liked making others cry. In about grade 10, I got in shape, started working-out, was avid in karate and began fighting back and winning when my bullies tried to pick on me. After that, I couldn't stand and watch anyone else have the same thing happen to them knowing I could step in and do something about it.
Or I could be a poser and have lied about everything I just said to make myself look good. You decide. I can't actually prove anything.
I'll go with the fact that it happened. Just a gut feeling on my end. ;)
I never got bullied as a kid, but I certainly stood up for the ones who did whenever I saw it take place. Nobody ever came back on me about it either because even at a young age I wouldn't take any shit from anyone.
The sad reality is, in this corrupted fathom many all 'home' there are more posers who lie about everything just to make themselves look good. There are also many who will copy the advice given to them in notepad or some kind of word program, not actually take that advice to better themselves, then use those exact words that were given to them by someone else, and then post (tell) that to someone else who is having trouble, as their own words were spoken! How twisted is that?! >:(
No Naeth, I mean to tell you that I've never seen anyone receive death threats or threats of violence on this forum. I was speaking more so to Taiga specifically when I mentioned it. :P
: Renwaldo April 06, 2011, 08:48:42 -06:00
No Naeth, I mean to tell you that I've never seen anyone receive death threats or threats of violence on this forum. I was speaking more so to Taiga specifically when I mentioned it. :P
Ten-four. I thought you were extending your original query from the first page:
: Renwaldo April 03, 2011, 12:58:06 -06:00
Without a specific instance in mind, there is not much I can say about this. . . ???
It could just be a board wide PMS session. XD
But really, i still don't see how posting to a general audience about a select few people who are being assholes is going to fix the problem. if anything, people who weren't necessarily being targeted are going to feel targeted and get upset therefore only making the problem worse.
Those few people who are being assholes, sadly, screw the dynamics up for everyone else. It's like the rotten apple in the wheelbarrow.
: EmoFox April 06, 2011, 01:01:24 -06:00
It could just be a board wide PMS session. XD
But really, i still don't see how posting to a general audience about a select few people who are being assholes is going to fix the problem. if anything, people who weren't necessarily being targeted are going to feel targeted and get upset therefore only making the problem worse.
I am inclined to agree.
A minority of baddies only effect the community as long as people pay attention to them. If everyone ignored those trying to start trouble, then they will disappear. If they're trolling with things as serious as death threats the mods on this forum are very good with getting rid of such posts.
: Renwaldo April 06, 2011, 06:03:38 -06:00
I am inclined to agree.
A minority of baddies only effect the community as long as people pay attention to them. If everyone ignored those trying to start trouble, then they will disappear. If they're trolling with things as serious as death threats the mods on this forum are very good with getting rid of such posts.
(http://d.yimg.com/i/ng/ne/itn/20110309/10/3280152095-charlie-sheen-angry-sacking.jpg)
I WILL MURDER YOU VIOLENTLY
I think some furs posting in this thread could use <Deleted image> a or two. Just something I've noticed.
well it shouldn't be surprising for furries of all people to be butthurt, mang :P
[MOD] No personal attacks :police: [/MOD]
Yep. That's me. The ridiculously sexist gay guy that runs around making fun of females all day with nothing better to do with his free time.
I think it's funny how you think everything I say is directed at you. Contrary to what you believe, not everything is about you. I feel sad to say that I actually enjoyed seeing you at Gizmo's parties. Up until now, I actually held a little respect for you, because you haven't personally attacked me, you just defended your opinions. You have crossed the line, missy.
I don't think I have ever singled someone out, called them bad names, degrated them or even belittled anyone.
p.s. That was extremely rude of you telling me to do that. There are minors that can browse these forums. How would you like it if adults went around your child and swore and cursed around him? Try to set an example for people, and not get all butthurt over random comments on the internets.