At the moment I don't have money or time to install a lock.
My mother's decided it's appropriate to throw out a bunch of stuff in my room, including expensive zeta paws & bad dragon toys.
So, I need to figure out a way to jam the door which will enable me to get back in, but is simultaneously complicated or tricky enough to deter her. I've been trying for about an hour but I'm apparently not all that creative ^^;
Well, if I understand correctly, it's her home, and your still living at your parents, so I don't think that's the right way to go about it. Possible choices:
a. Hide them real well.
b. Move out.
c. Keep them with another furry.
d. Have a talk to convince her that your room is private.
bad dragon toys <.< that's not something your mother should be seeing O_O
its easy to jam it from the inside (the ol' board and shoe trick is enough to keep most people out) but making it so you can enter and leave would be tricky, if not impossible
Best advice I can give: Replace the doorknob with a locking one, as well as finding a new place to store your toys and paws.
I probably should clarify that my stuff is hidden in a covered box at the bottom of a drawer, covered by blankets.
Just tell her you're hiding sex toys in there and where she shouldn't be snooping around if she doesn't want to see them.
Yeah, i'd replace the door knob. Even if it is your mom's house, you're an adult and she should respect your privacy. Obviously she can't do that, so I would start protecting your privacy.
: Renwaldo March 24, 2011, 12:54:53 -06:00
Just tell her you're hiding sex toys in there and where she shouldn't be snooping around if she doesn't want to see them.
Zeta Paws and Bad Dragon are sex toys.. And I'm sure she's already found them. lol.
Could you go buy a cheap combination lock and hide them in a box that's locked up? Or in a chest or drawers or large container that's too much of a hassle for your mom to throw out? How did she find out that you had this stuff in the first place and why is she throwing it out without permission? D:
well you know how some parents are dinsu... i can't really say i blame them either, if i ever decided to have children, i imagine it would be rather... creepy to think of them doing anything even remotely sexual.
: Sevrin March 24, 2011, 03:09:13 -06:00
well you know how some parents are dinsu... i can't really say i blame them either, if i ever decided to have children, i imagine it would be rather... creepy to think of them doing anything even remotely sexual.
lolol good point.. I guess if I was a parent I'd just be too weirded out to say anything at all let alone get all involved and throw things out.
Every time it's seems that people only read half of what the original post is.
If she's storing some Zeta/Dragon toys in your room I'm presuaming they're furry, so maybe there's some spare fur throwen in there. Make a plushy or something.
They're putting stuff in the room they let you sleep in I'm sure they wouldn't mind if you looked around in the boxes or bags of they they've put in there. Make use of what they've put in your room, if you can't, and don't feel you actually have to room to store it in your room just move it into a corner of the living room.
Perhaps they're giving you last dibs on what to salvage before chucking it out. Figure out what you can play with or create something with and have fun.
Kohl, I don't think you understand my post.
The toys are MINE, not my mother's. She isn't storing anything in my room- everything in here is mine. I don't know what you're saying about fur or making plushies because it really doesn't have anything to do with my post. I hardly think you're in a position to declare people only read half of the original post.
My bad. I actually read, my mother is throwing a bunch of stuff into my room.
^That would be a bizarre scenario. I imagine that would be much worse.
: PurpleVeggie March 25, 2011, 06:00:37 -06:00
^That would be a bizarre scenario. I imagine that would be much worse.
lmao No kidding.
"MOOOOOO~OOOOM!!! Stop putting your dildos in my room!"
oh god that would be creepy
I will never look at any of my dildos the same way again ...
Leave a sock on the door handle with some music playing in the room.
That doesn't help with her taking my shit.
You're gonna have to put a lock on your door, if you want to stop her from entering your room. Especially if moving out is NOT feasible.
Just finding ways to not make her to not want to go in. Also a solution that would not damge the knob or the door. Actually locking or blocking the door may piss her off. Then you might have to stay there without a door at all.
My solution would be to figure out what you would really like to keep, stuff it in a backpack, take it with you.
Just lube up the door handle. She won't want to go in after that.
: Sikkab March 31, 2011, 05:46:40 -06:00
Just lube up the door handle. She won't want to go in after that.
this is a good idea
: Sikkab March 31, 2011, 05:46:40 -06:00
Just lube up the door handle. She won't want to go in after that.
I lost my shit. Lolololol.
SO doing this.
The fact that your mother would be willingly throwing away your sex-toys is somewhat baffling to me. If I were in the same scenario with my parents, my folks would probably be weirded-out so bad to the point that they wouldn't even make mention to anything remotely phallic:
Mum: "I'm going grocery-shopping, Steve, what would you like for fruit?"
Me: "Apples and bananas, plz."
Mum: "Okay! Apples it is!"
What I would do, though, is I'd specifically tell her that those things cost a great amount of money (I mean, hell... my BD toy cost me what... $120?), and that you'd greatly appreciate it if she could leave what is YOURS alone.
Don't do anything destructive or counterproductive. You ARE living in HER house and you technically have no right to be locking your door, I'm afraid. And if your parents are anything like mine are, you'd come back to find that the door has been kicked-in and completely removed. (I arrogantly played my xbox way late into the night a few times and I came home from school one day to find the TV completely gone but my xbox was still sitting there. I owned the xbox but it was my dad's TV, lol.)
Good luck in your situation. =P I'd be absolutely furious to find out that my parents were removing my owned items without my permission. Living alone does have its benefits.
: Naetholix April 01, 2011, 09:12:23 -06:00
You ARE living in HER house and you technically have no right to be locking your door, I'm afraid.
I disagree, that's like saying, your landlord has the right to come into the room you are renting because its their house, everyone deserves privacy, and living in a place where you feel like you're constantly being watched or having people go through all your stuff is no way to live at all, when I lived with my parents I made it very clear to them that my room was MY ROOM and that they had no right to enter without my permission except in certain situations that could be compared to law enforcement entering your house with a warrant eg: removal of unowned objects due to failure to complete chores (repossession), room inspection due to suspicion of theft, etc.
the right to privacy is an essential one, and what murphys mother is doing enrages me because it violates that right.
: Naetholix April 01, 2011, 09:12:23 -06:00You ARE living in HER house and you technically have no right to be locking your door, I'm afraid.
I'm sorry, but if Murphy took her parents to court over it, demanding reimbursement for the items lost, especially since she is an adult, the defense "She lives in MY house, she has no right to privacy, personal belongings etc." Would not stand up in court, and her mother would lose. Why? Because it doesn't matter who's house you're living in, it doesn't matter if they're charging you rent, you ALWAYS have a basic right to privacy, ESPECIALLY after you've reached the age of majority. If murphy was under age, I could see perhaps a talking to if it really made her mother THAT uncomfortable, but nothing, -NOTHING- gives her the right to do what she is doing. And nothing gives her the right to remove murphy's door should she install a lock.
Although in retrospect, I can't help but wonder, Murphy, did you confront her about her actions? Tell her "hey, that's my stuff, wtf are you doing? I spent my hard earned cash on that. How about I go toss out your sex toys?" or anything like that?
Sorry, I think I should have worded that "You have no right to be modifying elements of the house that you don't own." If your door already had a lock on it, I don't see what the problem would be. Maybe ask them if you could do this. And if you pay rent, Murphy, then yes, I would agree that it's perfectly reasonable to install a lock on your door without having to ask. However, if you're living for free, I have to say that your level of authority over the situation is somewhat diminished.
aah the age old argument; which is greater, the rights of the individual or the rights of society?
How much privacy is too much? Either way you look at it, it's an invasion of Murphy's privacy. Whether she pays rent or not is irrelevant, it's still an invasion of her privacy. The logical step to protect one's privacy when it's being invaded is to install a lock. So now which is greater, Murphy's right to privacy (i almost typed piracy, lol) or her mother's right to her property?
That's what it comes down to. And again I point out that in a court of law, or even taken up to the residential tenancy branch, Murphy would win, because the privacy of an individual is generally considered greater than a landlord/homeowners right to invade said privacy. Why? Because no one has the right to invade the privacy of another human being, especially one's that are over the age of maturity. It's not a question of Murphy's authority over anything, it's a question of human rights regarding privacy. Just because Murphy is living in her mother's house, rent free or not, does not mean that she waives her right to privacy. If her mother can't respect her privacy, then murphy should protect it by installing a lock.
I absolutely have confronted her about the loss of my personal property. Her response is usually along the lines of "Well, you're living under my roof and have to follow my rules!" The thing is, my brother smokes dope and steals and hocks our stuff, and gets away with it. I've been told that if my room isn't clean, I'll be out on the streets. And I really, really wish I was exaggerating.
Oh, I'm also permagrounded because I haven't found a job yet. Which means I can't go out and apply for one. Seriously? Occasionally I can get outside and go job hunting, but for the most part, I'm not allowed out.
The weirdest part is, these are only occasional outbursts of crazy. The rest of the time she's cool, and a great person to be around. At the moment I'm barricaded in my room, facing the very real possibility of finding a new place to sleep tonight and for the next little while, but just this morning she made me a latte and we talked about a play I just saw the other night.
I just bought an OhMiBod, which cost me over $80. Before I even had a chance to use it, it was gone. I had opened it ONCE to look at it, and it was still in it's box.
As for a lock, she's removed my door before and would not hesitate to do it again. At the moment I've jammed a stick and a leather strap against the handle, so she can't get in, but it only works when I'm in my room.
The last time this sort of craziness occurred, I was sixteen. She punched me in the head and I wound up with a concussion. TO THIS DAY I have a dent in my skull. I really don't want it to get to that point again, but I simply can't afford to leave, unless I sleep on the streets.
well i know from experience that life gets much better when you move out, my relationship with my mother even improved quite a bit. (so you should do it as soon as you can)
ooh, you have one of THOSE crazy moms. :/
Has she given you a set list of any rules saying you can't have sex toys? Seems ridiculous to me. start bringing boys home, XD and when she confronts you about it tell her "Well if SOME ONE hadn't tossed out my sex toys, I wouldn't NEED any boys."
What you could do, hoping she hasn't actually thrown them in the garbage, is get them back under the pretense of selling them to a friend (grossness of sharing sex toys aside, please. some people will actually buy them.) to regain the money you spent on them and then just store them elsewhere. Or lock them in a chest.
The most ridiculous thing is, I have girls over all the time (or I did before my current mate who does not live here fffff), and she didn't care. She knows I'm pretty sexually active.
I GUESS SEX TOYS ARE JUST NOT OKAY HUH
So I may start bringing boys home, just to make her wtf all over the place (i thot u were lesbian wut)
Got a locked box to put in the back of my closet, and I'm working on finding a job asap to try and remedy my situation.
if you need a good combo lock i got one!
: MurphyErasmus April 02, 2011, 05:18:42 -06:00
The last time this sort of craziness occurred, I was sixteen. She punched me in the head and I wound up with a concussion.
Okay, that is NOT fucking cool. Mother who gave you life and fed and clothed you or not, I think she forfeit her right to make rules the second she took a headshot at you.
Were it that you lived in the Wack, I'd offer for you to room with me when I move out of the place I'm currently in. I'm sorry I misjudged your situation. Inflicting bodily harm on someone when it wasn't your intent to do so to her is absolutely unacceptable to me. Sure, my parents wailed on my backside with a belt or a wooden-spoon, and to this day I don't have a problem with those methods of discipline, but they never ever went over that. =\
I wish i could help but none of my methods worked.. ever my father's last fight with me ended up with him having 3 broken ribs and me cowaring due to his enormous strength >.> (not even a joke this man is someone to truly be feared) anyways i dont know why i wrote that sorry only thing ive ever been able to do was try to take on myparents and if your considering it... dont do it it wont end well
It's all good, Naetholix. ^^ Thanks for the kind thoughts, everyone.
I've rigged a couple different locks on a storage box, as well as bored a hole in one side to add a third lock. Bit time-consuming but hey, whatever works, right?
I'm also talking to my mother about a temporary situation, which will consist of her paying half my rent until such time as I can support myself outside the house or she deems me fit to return >.> However, if I last out another three months here, she'll be gone the whole summer, which is a good situation for both of us and usually gets us back into agreement.
I've sort of realized I've been a bit of a dickbutt lately, which contributes to her getting irritated with me.
Anyway, I've taken all of your suggestions into account, considered my plan of action, and I'm working through things as much as possible right now. Hopefully there'll be a change soon.
I booby trapped the top of the door with Gatorade. Had too many unwanted intrusions while I was out, and it only took one time and my privacy was mine again. :evil:
Use one of your Bad dragon toys to jam the door shut!